I felt a bit defeated after yesterday’s news from the lawyer. I was hoping to stay in Ireland and work, but I need a work visa or European Union status to do so. I am in the process of getting my European Status but it will take some time, perhaps a year. People have asked if I could work under the table but I cannot because I am only allowed to stay in Ireland for 3 months before they come looking for me. The bright side is, it is only one year and I will be back to see my mother. I need to stop worrying about the future and start enjoying the time I have with my mother. We are all allowed to have one bad day out of a few amazing days, it is only normal. I woke up this morning, sucked it up and put on my big girl panties, and then did some laundry. Now I go to mom’s to drink some Tuica and eat some of my mother’s delicious food. I will enjoy the time I have with her and not worry because I only have 38 days left before I go again.
If you can understand the thought of being separated from her again is terrifying. I have lost her for 25 years of my life, and yes, I know one year is better than another 25 years. It is still time lost. Anything can happen within this next year, and I would hate to never see her again. Thank you to those who have donated because this allows her to keep warm for the winter and survive a little longer so I can come back and see her.
She told me yesterday that she cannot believe that it is me. I asked her why and what she meant by this, and she replied, “Because you are sent from god. You have helped me so much and I cannot believe it is my baby girl who has come back. Not only did you give me the happiness of seeing you again but you have given me things to survive.” This was not only my help, but the help from all those who have been inspired by her story. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. It does ease my mind knowing that she will be warm this winter. I hope to go pick out a new mattress for her in the next week and have it delivered for Christmas. It is our Christmas gift to her, so thank you. She sleeps on a wooden frame with a very worn out mattress. Her back hurts all the time and she continues to work hard to keep her house warm and food on the table. We do not have very good backs in our family to begin with so you can imagine that it is not an ideal sleeping arrangement.
She is so blessed to have so many people care for her as my siblings and I do. She has a giant heart, and if she had the chance she would thank each of you individually for helping her. She is so humbled to accept the donations but she knows that it is for the right reasons. It is not for frivolous spending, it is for necessities to help keep her and my other siblings healthy. She is so overwhelmed that we have all helped her so much. I am humbled when she calls me a miracle from God.
As my favourite quote goes, “Life is a battle to be enjoyed.” It is meant to throw spears in your direction, and if you are quick enough you can dodge them or heal the wounds with time.